[<< wikiquote] Girls with Slingshots
Girls with Slingshots is a webcomic written and drawn by Danielle Corsetto.  It is about the everyday trials and tribulations of adulthood, starring two best friends, Hazel and Jamie.  It updates five days a week.


== Number 1-99 ==
Hazel: I don't think inflatable sheep are considered "stuffed animals."Number 3Hazel: Honey, he's hot, charming, funny, and well-dressed...inevitably, that adds up to "loves the cock."Number 18Jameson: My and all this time I thought you couldn't smell jealousy.Number 42Jamie: You know, I'd say you're cute when you're jealous, but you're really not that cute.Number 81Hazel: Why are all my best compliments in the form of insults?Number 87


== Number 100-199 ==
Hazel: I've never despised an ellipsis so much in my life.Number 114Jamie: Well, how do you know they don't use the Dewey Decimal System in porn stores?Hazel: If by "Dewey" you mean "wet," you may have a point there.
Number 138Hazel: I think I just lost my status as "meanest character."Number 167Chris: I thought dead hooker jokes were just JOKES!!Number 178


== Number 200-299 ==
Scott: I take it I'm the only one in the room with a steady sex life.Number 217Hazel: Okay...Denial, Anger, Bargaining...I think I'll skip straight to Depression.Number 252Hazel: Believe it or not, this is ENTIRELY about me.Number 257Hazel: You're so mean it makes ME look good.Number 294Candy: How dare you analyze me so correctly!Number 295


== Number 300-399 ==
Jamie: What IS wrong with Jim?Hazel: Besides the fact that we can't figure out what's wrong with him, nothing.
Number 306Jamie: Somewhere, in an alternate universe, you and I are covered in badges!Hazel: Meanwhile, in THIS universe, we are going straight to hell.
Number 333Jim: It wasn't a vacation. It was a leave of embarrassment.Number 342Jamie: I think about kids all the time! I hear they're delicious sauteed in butter.Number 383Maureen: Jamie, your breasts are...legendary.Jamie: You can say it twice. I consider them each a separate legend.
Number 395


== Number 400-499 ==
Jamie: Wow. And you aren't even sleeping together.Hazel: I know.
Jamie: This is like a real, grown-up relationship!
Hazel: I know.
Jamie: How are you doing this?
Hazel: Masturbating like CRAZY.
Number 433Hazel: What's this? A miniature pony?Zach: In case you didn't like the tickets. All girls like ponies.
Number 452Jamie: We need a Heartbreak Bacardi and some free bartender advice over here!Number 496


== Number 500-599 ==
Hazel: Calling it a "meeting" instead of "drinks" takes all the fun out of it.Number 544Hazel: Why do you always freak out when I'm in a good mood?Jameson: It's weird!
Number 570Hazel: How's it shakin', eggs 'n' bacon?Jamie: Large an' loose, like your caboose!
Number 587


== Number 600-699 ==
Hazel: That wasn't me, that was my ovaries.Number 617Jameson: Oh, thank GOD, you're finally getting LAID!Number 631David: If you're suggesting I have bitchtits, I'm mildly offended. Unless you like bitchtits.Number 650Jameson: Sorry, I'm afraid you need less Asshole Points to access that information.Number 684Zach: They're OLD PEOPLE, not ZOMBIES!Hazel: But, they're FRAGILE like zombies.
Number 691


== Number 700-799 ==
Hazel: "Why are my cat's farts so nasty?" Oh Internet, is there nothing you don't know.Number 728Jamie: Remind me to trick you into complimenting me more often.Number 744Candy: Whoa, is that kangaroo hide?Number 752Zach: Nonsense, you're far too sober to dump me.Number 773Davan: Which side has the crazier women? I want to feel at home.Number 781


== External links ==

Girls with Slingshots